High School Sucks

47. Prep

 

This was an uncomfortable read for me.  I really recognized myself in the main character; I wanted her to change in ways I was never confident enough to, and then I just wanted it to be over.  Kind of like high school. And when it was, I felt disappointed because really nothing happens.  Kind of like high school.  Lee lets us in to her four years at boarding school and then it is over, and nothing has really changed for her or for anyone else.

The setting of the boarding school with the dorms, and the mailboxes, and the cafeteria reminded me of my college years, so I had to keep reminding myself that Lee was much younger than I was picturing her.  I can’t imagine living in that world at such a young age, but either way so much of what she went through are things that I remember going through as well, and are obviously things many more people go through than anyone is aware of.

The feeling that you know every odd detail about everyone else, but they know nothing about you.

Being painfully aware of the you inside versus what people see, or what you allow them to know. Even, and especially, your family and closest friends.

Being constantly caught up in thinking socially when you should be studying and learning, and only understanding the consequences of that too late.

The fleeting realization that there are so many people living, and wondering what they are doing. It is all so big, and you really are so small, but it always closes back in on you.

But mostly, wondering if you will ever fit in... anywhere.