Not Such a Great Discovery

“Happiness is always louder than sadness.” Truth.

48.12 A Discovery of Witches

This book lost me early on, very early on.

There was the witch who really didn’t want to be a witch but would use magic when she couldn’t be bothered to find a step stool, or turn off the water. There were the many descriptions of the clothes she wore to work versus to exercise versus to sleep versus to whatever, who cares. There was the vampire who practiced yoga - Screeech! What the !?! - Yep, that is where it lost me. The big, bad, dangerous vampire who maybe isn’t so big and bad because he can perform a perfect shavasana. He is a vampire from cripes sake isn’t that the very definition of shavasana??? Jebus, I can’t.

Anyway... The entire book is over bloated with silly details. Do I need to know that you are making two pieces of toast despite the fact the toaster has six slots?  Nope. Do I need to know how different characters carve their jack-o-lanterns? Nope.  The book certainly does not need to be 600 pages. The core story shouldn’t have been more than 300, plus it doesn’t even finish. As I got closer and closer to the last page, with little to none of the plot resolved, I started to get a funny feeling...  Another f-ing trilogy. I have to admit that the set up of the second book seems interesting but it also seems like it will be a story within a story and not get us any closer to a resolution.  It clocks in at about 600 pages as well, so let me guess, there will be movies? Probably six because all the books are so long.  Right, because everything now a days needs to become the next million-dollar machine. Ugh. Stop it.

There were things here I really liked. I loved the idea of looking at the DNA of vampires and witches and trying to find where they began, and I am always down with a hunt for a mysterious antique book, but too little of that was lost in all the toast eating and wine and tea drinking. Not to mention the romance that wasn't really a romance. I hear a lot of people bemoaning the future of publishing in the e-book era, but what of publishing in the absent editor era?